Well Halloween is over for another year. Mommy dressed in her traditional costume "Wild-Haired Lady, with No Makeup in a Nightie" and Daddy in his "Middle-Aged Guy Who's Way To Excited About Carving a Pumpkin." We did the traditional things, but it got me thinking.
Back in July I made some very well received suggestions on how America should alter the way it celebrates its birthday (look for an official campaign to be launched next year). After much careful consideration, I’d like to now suggest some changes to how we celebrate Halloween.
Change one - I don’t like the sound of the doorbell. It startles me. I also don’t care for my parents constantly getting up from the couch to answer the door for the wee ones. It disturbs my napping or snuggle time. Here's what I’d like to see instead. All the wee ones should gather together in front of the house, when everyone is present, they may politely knock on the door. The humans of the house pass out the treats, as the wee ones look in through the door and admire the kitty (resting at a safe distance, of course). When the candy runs out, or within 15 minutes, whichever comes first, Halloween is over, and on to the next house for the wee ones.
Change two - Why are we the only ones handing out treats? Shouldn't this be two way street? I’d like to see the wee ones bring offerings for the cat of the house as an exchange. Perhaps small hunks of Beef Jerky or Temptations can be left as offerings in a large bowl by the front door - call it a Bast bowl perhaps.
I think you'll agree that with these simple changes, Halloween can be fun for everyone.
Oh and I'd like to give a special shout out to Tater, my new pup hero. Mommy said a co-worker was trying on her scary Halloween outfit the night before Halloween, and saw that it startled the poor pup. She then chased poor Tater, amid startled barks, around the house. When she later removed the outfit, and fell asleep in a wine induced haze, Tater attacked and destroyed the costume. Good Dog! A virtual pat on the head for you.