12.30.2011

The Prize

Meg here, hope you enjoy this post from my Meg S Hart human blog. 

So this morning I was checking whatever one feels compelled to check on their laptop first thing in the morning, when I heard a loud crunching sound. It's a sound my cat-mom ears know well, crunching cellophane. Nothing pleases Fin more than to chomp on a hunk of the stuff. Of course I have to be the buzz-kill and stop her.

On a mission to make sure she doesn't swallow a huge swath, I begin my surveillance. I spot her quickly on the dining table (now I'll have to figure out how she got up there too) and she has her back to me.

"HEY! KNOCK THAT OFF!" I shout to the unresponsive Finny. Well perhaps not unresponsive because she turns towards me at that point, perhaps to show a more flagrant disregard for my order. I see an object in the darkness but still can't tell what she might be crunching away on.

"DON'T MAKE ME COME OVER THERE!" We both know that's probably a lie.Apparently she heard "jump off the table and take your prize with you" because that's what she did instead. I was finally able to see what she had claimed.

A fortune cookie still in it's little cellophane sack. It was resting comfortably in her jaws as she fled the scene of the crime. The site of it tickled me so much that I even let her crunch it for a time.

Her fortune? Don't stop dreaming, otherwise sleep will get boring. A great fortune for a sleepy kitty I say. 

Guess what? Me and my girl will be celebrating our birthdays on Sunday. She will be turning 15 and I will be celebrating 15 too, sure there will be another 31 on top of that, but who's counting. I think I need to plan a party.

12.28.2011

And the Moon

Here's another favorite from the past, hope you enjoy it. By the way our floofster is still doing well. She needs the appetite enhancer but she is sassy and full with it.


As I reported yesterday the changing of the sunrise has thrown me off my efforts to wake Mom. Admittedly, I've been late a few times, and in an effort to over compensate, early a few times too. I've even been caught off guard and been awakened by the hated noisy box.

The other night I was sitting on the bathroom floor, waiting for the sun, when I noticed - the Moon. Sometime in the night, Mom had kicked off her covers, exposing a section of lily white tush that actually glowed in the moonlight. I was mesmerized.

Of course I've touched the butt before, but perhaps it was the coolness of the tiles, and my desire for a refill of my water, that lead me to my next thought - what if I touched the celestial body with my paw, my cold paw. No, better yet, my cold, damp paw.

I gripped the cool porcelain (I think a paw held in front of the AC vent would work well here too), and waited. When I was adequately chilled, I stuck my paw in the water bowl and headed off for - a Moon landing.

I made a stealthily approach, hoping she wouldn't turn or change the cover arrangement. I sat down, lifted my paw, and suddenly, I felt a bit guilty. I gave a warning meow, to give her an opportunity to awaken at my first request (okay, I whispered it, but I did do it). No response. I laid my cold damp paw upon the Moon. One small step for Fin, one giant leap for catkind.

Now kitties, here is where the danger comes - you need to leap back, you're going need to be at a safe distance. Prepare your most innocent face, you're going to need to deny any intentional wrong doing. You might want to cover your ears too, with the dry paw of course.

12.24.2011

Merry Christmas

Here is another post from my new human blog that you can find here or on Kindle by searching for Hart Stories or by my pen name Meg S Hart.

I don't know why this time of year gets me so nostalgic, but it does. Growing up Christmas was always a special time of year for me, and not just because of the presents either (although my former nickname of "Present Pig" would lead you to think differently). As a child we had a long break from school which allowed us to fly back east to Illinois from sunny California and spend the holiday at my Grandmother's house. My Grandmother was the Martha Stewart of her day.

She'd work so hard to make the holidays as special as she could. Everything from velvet ribbons on the polished apples to thoughtfully selected and beautifully wrapped gifts. One year she even had the groundskeeper tie red velvet ribbons on the flock of white pigeons they owned. Hm, that sounds kind of exotic doesn't it? Someday I'll tell you about the peacocks and then the pigeons won't seem exotic at all.Seriously, she had peacocks.

When my Grandmother passed I spent years boycotting Christmas. It made me too sad to see the world wrapped up in its Christmas finery when my Grandmother wasn't in the world to enjoy it. It was silly really. Who was I punishing?

I found Christmas again a couple of years ago, but now I am all in (not velvet-tied apples in - but who is?). I started to gather the glitziest, most sparkly ornaments I could find. Although my husband hates glitter because it "gets" everywhere, I even have sneaked some of them in too. I love ornaments that remind me of the way snow twinkles and frost both illuminates and obscures a window pane.

I love to sit in my quiet house and stare at my sparkly Christmas tree. If I can get my precious kitty on my lap and have a good book in my hand, well it's nothing short of perfection.

Life is like glitter, it's beautiful, it's messy and you never know where it's going to end up.

Happy Holidays to all our Friends!

12.23.2011

Floofy Friday

Hi kitties and friends! Mom, er, Meg here. I wanted to give you a little update on my floofy girl, and the news is good! She is eating and drinking again, with a bit of encouragement, and there has been some occasional bouts of full throttle sass. Lots of napping and snuggles to be had too.

It makes me so happy to be awakened from a dead sleep to give her a snack, seriously it does. We are spoiling her with anything she likes, and we are all loving every minute of it. So put your paws in the air and let's get some vintage floof up in here!


Wonder if Sandy Claws is in here?
Happiest of Holidays to all of you friends!

12.19.2011

The First Post

Here is the first post from my human blog. You can find it on Kindle by searching Hart Stories or by Meg S Hart.

Hello World!

It's me, Meg, ::whispers:: and I'm human. Maybe some of you saw that one coming. If you're new here you're likely to be confused by that revelation, so let me explain. 

I'm starting my own blog after blogging for three plus years using my cat's voice. Why blog as a cat? It started as a way to find an audience for a book called Housecat Confidential that I wrote in her voice. I guess I should back up even more - why write a book as a cat?

Speaking in my cat's voice all began by trying to mimic my cat's many variations on meow. She is a true kitty linguistic, and it did seem like you could really understand her wants and needs if you could just crack the code.

Eventually my hubby and I began to interpret those vocalization into English. Once we had her talking, it didn't take long for us to begin to insert our humor into those interpretations.Why ask "Honey, can you feed the cat?" when there are so many more fun ways to ask when you ask it like the cat would?

I have to admit my girl Fin didn't initially seem to be the brightest star in the sky, until the day I realized her "playing dumb" was an effective way to get what she wanted. Finny De Floof - Master Mind was born. 

Suddenly all the odd (but turns out perfectly normal) behavior of a cat took on new meaning to me. I began to try to see life through her eyes, and it was a life I liked looking at. It was filled with love (for us and a more forbidden variety with a toy mouse), hope (surely that can of tuna will be opened soon), work stresses (humans don't wake themselves) and many of the same frustrations we all face.

The world was a more interesting place from her point of view. I could learn to take life and myself less serious - why just have self-deprecating humor when you can have a cat do it for you. 

Her world was much smaller, but somehow much richer too. I started to realize that she had everything she needed to be happy within our home, and when I opened my heart I realized I did too. I started a journey to find the same joy and wonder in life and within myself, and I stopped looking for outside things to make me happy.

In the end I found that I wasn't alone, turns out there were a lot of other kind people who also like to look at the world through the eyes of a cat. So what does the world look like through my human eyes? I guess we'll all figure that out if you stick around, and I sure hope you do.

12.18.2011

My First Taste

This post was when Fin first tasted gravy. I thought it would be so funny for the blog to get a photo op. The joke was on me though as she never went back to dry kibble again. My mornings of sleeping in late were OVER!  Please enjoy!

Fancy Feast is in the house, and apparently it can be purchased right at the regular grocery store, who knew? Dad bought the place out I think with multiple cans and varieties (note to Mom - this is one reason Dad’s my favorite).

After much excited dancing by my dish (on my part naturally), Mom cracked open a can of Trout. I felt a little sorry for her because she looked like she might have a hairball of her own.

“Oh the humanity! I’m going to hurl, are you happy now?” She called out.


“Mew!” I replied hardily, meaning “Yep!”

Mom put down my trout as she tried to hold back the hairball with two hands. I started giving it a hardy inspection, but I have to admit I wasn’t too sure about it. I was gingerly sniffing, when I noticed Mom at the ready with the camera (she thought it would be nice to show me enjoying my first feast). Well as you can imagine, I don’t like to be rushed – and she knows the pawparazzi war isn’t over yet. I decided I needed a moment to regroup, so I made the universal gesture of “I’m not done here, I’ll be back for it later” by pawing the ground all around the plate in an effort to bury the feast.

“Oh no you don’t little cat, you’re eating that – and don’t wake me up in the middle of night with that on your cat breath either.” Mom called out as she ran from the kitchen to the freshness of the outdoor air.

After picking at it for a while, even I had to admit trout wasn’t for me and I abandoned the area, my head hung low in embarrassment. Mom (smugly) put it outside for Mittens to find. She also made Dad take out the trash like it held toxic waste, all over a little trout (What a drama queen!). We were all very upset.

We had found the stinky, but where was the goodness? The goodness my friends was finally found, two varieties (chicken and a mystery meat I still don’t recognize) and some cross words later, in a little can called Tuna and in one called Ocean Feast. I found them quite tasty and stinky, in a good way.

Although I hate to admit it - I think Mom might be right (another reason I prefer Dad) I am spoiled and I do prefer Dad’s flakey white tuna (it's even dolphin safe). I’m torn. If I eat the feast will I be denied the other? I can’t chance it - Eat up Mittens, I’m holding out for the good stuff.

12.17.2011

Retirement Party

Welcome to my retirement party friends! Mom and I are happy to report that I am getting a little better every day. I can tell you now what Mom couldn't last week, I was suddenly REALLY sick. It was a total shock to my parents.

I don't want to dwell on any sadness, and there is no way to tell without a lot of invasive tests, but the doctors think I may have a form of lymphoma, and that's not so good friends. I am really feeling a lot better now and the hope is that I still have lots of great and happy times in front of me. My Sass-O-Meter is back to Medium and I woke Mom up for breakfast on time as usual. I'm looking forward to kicking back and soaking up all the love, sun puddles, and porch time I can.

So I'm letting Mom have her own voice from now on. Of course I may have guest posts on Mom's blog (and of course she'll probably talk about me), and naturally as her muse, I will have my paw in all things she writes (sometimes literally). Who knows, someday when there's a "One who'll come after me" Casa De Housecat may have a new kitty with blogging chops at the helm. Looking at the world through feline eyes is addictive.
 
I've found the kindest and most amazing friends to read what I have to say. It's been the best, and most unexpected, experience to be able to meet all of you! So please join us in a celebration of a few of our favorite things.

Over the next month we're going to post some of our very favorite posts (or yours - just let us know) and new posts from Mom's new blog here at the HC. The new blog is listed in our profile and we will include links on this site.

Special note to our Kindle subscribers, the new blog is available now on the Amazon site and it's called Hart Stories (but search by Meg S Hart and save yourself some scrolling). You're subscription to this feed will end as soon as your monthly subscription runs out.


Now on to the party!! Please help yourself to the niptinis, meowgaritas, wine, and milk for the kittens. We have some treats and a giant e-cake. Please kick back and enjoy the only shot ever to appear on this blog of my special one... Behold Mousey!


Isn't he the most handsome mouse in the world?
No Dad, I am not amused.
See you around the blogosphere friends, much love to you.

Finny De Floof

12.15.2011

Floofy Flashback

Dang, I was darling as a kitten.

So friends, I'm still on the mend, and getting stronger. I have had lots of time to think and I've made a big decision. I think it's time for me to retire, kick up my paws and let Mom run the show from now on.

Mom has dreamed of having a little blog of her own for awhile now, someplace where she can shake off the fur and be human. Until recently I still had so much to say, and there's only so much time in a day, that I held my paw down and denied her request. Now I feel like the time is right to make the transition. Of course her life isn't nearly as exciting as mine, I'm a loved housecat - the best life a cat could want.

We hope you'll decide you like her voice too - oddly enough, it sounds a lot like mine. Go figure. We're going to try work it all out this weekend, and give you all the details very soon at my official retirement party. Hope you'll come and celebrate with us! Have a great weekend friends.

12.13.2011

Update

Hi everyone, we just wanted to give everyone a quick update on how I'm feeling. My Sass-O-Meter is definitely running lower than usual, but not so low that I can't take advantage of jumping up on the kitchen counter tops, or enjoying sun puddles on My Porch.

The Vet is pleased with my progress. My parents think she is the nicest Vet ever. Whatever. The medications are helping and I'm eating and drinking again which is all good. Your continued purrs are most welcome.

My parents are pretty busy catering to my every need, so Mom is on blog lock down for a bit longer. You never know when a grannycat will want to access a lap, and I don't like to share with a laptop. I'm a sprawller.

All this sleeping has me thinking big thoughts, and I think I have an idea that I'll share with you soon.

On a side note I wanted to thank all of you for sending me warm healing thoughts and love. They are really helping me and my parents feel better. Love to you all!

12.11.2011

The Purr List Officially

So there I was innocently hanging out in the shower stall (I like to hang there when I am not feeling well) when suddenly I was whisked into the PTU (Prisoner Transport Unit) and carted off to the VET. Not my usual vet either, cause they are not open on Sundays, so a new lady vet. My and Dad just thought she was great, I was not so thrilled.

I was actually starting to like her a little bit, till she started to manhandle me. She suggested that I don't like to be told what to do... yeah, she does really seem to get me. My usual vet file is marked with "Aggressive" and I live up to that title. Blood work, x-rays, and meds - oh my. The reviews are mixed, and she's not really sure what's up.

I'm really dehydrated so she sent my parents home with a bag and instructions on administering sub-q fluids. Good luck with that, I thought, I hope you have long sweaters and gloves. It went so-so, and we're waiting to see how I feel.

My kidney level is a little high, but the vet thinks it's because of the dehydration. The rest of my blood work was just fine, yeah for me. My x-ray was clear, but I do have arthritis in the hips, pretty normal for an old girl.

They are sending off my x-ray to a radiologist, as the vet is a little concerned there could be a more generalized, bigger issue. Hopefully it's just a gastro bug and getting fluids and antibiotics that taste cod awful will do the trick and have me feeling better in no time.

If you could be so kind as to add me to your purrs, we hope it's going to help get me and my parents through all this.

12.10.2011

Purrs are Helping

I'm still not eating a lot but I have snacked a bit, licked some gravy, and drank some cat milk. My parents say I am getting back a little sass too - if you consider trying to jump on the kitchen counters sass. So if you could keep a few spare purrs coming my way hopefully I will pull it out and be back to normal purfection.

Thanks for your support friends. It does mean the world to us here.

Spare Purrs Please

I know I said I was going to spend the weekend purring for my friends, but I think I may need a few purrs of my own. I woke Mom up this morning with some hairball expulsions and I have been unwilling to eat since. I'm still drinking and although I seem interested in food, I kinda sniff and then walk away. I am usually always willing to eat.

Of course I've done this plenty of times before and rallied to be perfect, but you know how parents worry. If you could spare a purr or two I'd like to avoid being hauled off to the evil vet.

Growing old... it's not for kittens.

12.09.2011

Floofy Friday

Who could resist this face requesting an additional meal?

Dad. That's who.

Lucky for me, Mom is a pushover. 

Dad is definitely the rule maker and I am the rule breaker. As I've said before, how do you know where the line is if you don't try to cross it. Who is the pushover at your place friends? 

On a different note, Mom and I wanted to take a moment to send our best healing thoughts our to our friends who are unwell right now. Having a sick fur baby is so hard and Mom's heart goes out to all our friends in this position. We have seen amazing things happen with the power of purrs and I plan on spending the weekend with my purr motor on high. Stay well friends.

12.07.2011

Lock Down

So yesterday I was minding my own business, napping in the closet, and you'll never guess what happened. Dad shut the door... and then he left the house... for an hour or more. When I was finely set free my meower was all hoarse and rough, but luckily I have other ways to make my needs known.

Of course I have spent countless hours in that closet, in a single sitting, happy as can be, but it's always by my choice. I'm free to come and go as I please. What is it about being locked in to make you want nothing more than to be out? And the reverse is true too, if I'm locked out, I want nothing more than to be let in.

12.06.2011

Toy Tuesday

I thought I'd give a little shout out to a special toy.
Do you see it there in the background? 
I know it's hard to focus with the darling grannycat in the foreground.

This is an exact replica of the toy Mom and I first played with at the shelter when she first found me. She had been searching for such a long time to find me, and when she walked into the shelter she saw me (darling little fluff ball with sass) and was immediately in love. Dad had told her no long hairs and so she tried to resist me, but let's face it who can resist me?

Mom noticed the swing toy and was trying to lure out all the kittens with it. I knew Mom was meant to be mine (she smelled like home to me - and she too is a long hair) and I was not gonna let her go. I jumped and leaped with such grace and enthusiasm that Mom could no longer resist me. 

When I was settled into my home Mom found the same swing toy and bought it for me. It's still my favorite toy (Mousey is not a toy of course). One swing and I turn from mature grannycat to small kitten. It makes my parents so happy and it makes me happy too.

So friends, what brings out your inner kitten?


12.02.2011

Floofy Friday

For your viewing pleasure...

 A bed of floofy goodness... 
Notice the paw placement for extra cuteness points?
Weekend, you may now commence.

So friends, what do you have planned for the weekend? It's getting cold here in the desert and there are rumors we have a slight chance for snow. Sounds like snuggle weather. Perfect.

11.30.2011

Full Tummy Tuesday

Fin: Dad, where's Mom? She's late and it's time for my dinner, this is critical.

Dad: She's running late, so I guess I'll feed you. (Wanders aimlessly towards kitchen) Oh hey, looks like a light bulb out, I think I'll change it...

Fin: Dad! Focus! (Herding towards kitchen) You were gonna feed me remember?

Dad: Oh yeah. (Looking at tin) Uh oh. I bought the wrong kind. You don't like this one... it's ocean fish.

Fin: I love ocean fish! Crack it open.

Dad: Really? Okay. (Cracking open tin) Wow, this stuff stinks!

Fin: I know! Let it flow Dad!

Dad: You know who doesn't like this? Your Mom. She's gonna be grossed out.

Fin: Look Dad, Mom's a total drama queen when it comes to a little stinky food. Besides she's not even home. Let's filler up! (Dives into full dish)

11.28.2011

Mom on Monday

Mom is on her way back to work after a week-long vacation during which she did a lot of... nothing. I love a nothing vacation, so much time for napping and petting. Except for the Thanksgiving day abandonment it couldn't have been nicer. I have to admit I was really happy to have them back. Friday night I purred so loud when we went to bed it made Mom giggle.


Sunday was my parents twenty-fourth dating anniversary, and they celebrated the same way they had all week, doing a whole lot of nothing. It was great. 

I had what Mom calls a Hollow Leg or a Case of the Hungries. I don't really question it much. Mom likes it since she gets so stressed when I don't feel like eating much. Some days you just get extra hungry... and no I don't think it had anything to do with my excessive play time with the nip nanna.

Mom started to not feel too hot on Saturday - we think she may have a little sinus infection, so she was feverish which makes her even more pleasant to nap on. Don't worry about her though, I have been very aggressive about getting my head in her our water cup, and you know how healing cat spit is. Plus she's had this view most of the week... and doesn't it make you feel better?

Yeah, all better.

11.25.2011

Finally Floofy Friday

Floofy Friday Mom? Just making it in under the wire as it's nearly Saturday...

Oh my, and an old pick at that. Tsk, tsk.

Wow! Reaching waaay back to the kitten archives. Shameless pandering.

This post has been brought to you by the slacker formerly known as Mom. Yes friends I have been abandoned. Left alone, all alone, with my Mousey. Sure they claimed it was only night, but as I've said before, one night in human years is seven in cat years. I have turned the back of disrespect to them both... after catching up on some neglected pets of course. 

I hope your weekends go well friends. I will be alternating snuggles and irritation with my family.

11.23.2011

Thanksgiving

Well it's Thanksgiving here in the United States and we have so many things to be thankful for. Here are a few of my favorite things in no particular order:

  • My parents. Yep I love em in all their human imperfections, of which there are plenty.
  • Superglue which is capable of gluing together a broken wand toy (I know you're thinking I broke my toy but actually it was all Dad's doing).
  • Tuna and tuna water. So delish.
  • Mousey. How I love the sound of his little jingle bell.
  • A good chin scritch, one that wraps around to the cheek and ends with a hard ear rub. Puuuuuur!
  • A nice warm lap.
Oh sure there's other things too but my nap time is late and I have lots of napping to catch up on so I'm ready for the main event tomorrow. Turkey. The star of the Thanksgiving plate. Step aside stuffing, all hail the Turk.

We hope you all have lots of things to be thankful for in your world Friends. We are very thankful for you, of that you can be sure.

11.22.2011

Transgressions

Well my parents are on their vacation and so far I have to say my approval of their activities (or lack thereof) is mixed:

Pros and cons
  • Mom spent multiple hours reading the new Stephen King book allowing for ample lap time on the con side she also spent multiple hours on that darn laptop cutting valuable lap time down.
  • Mom downloaded said novel on Kindle to allow for one-handed book-holding/page-turning thereby freeing up other hand for petting (the good hand too) - on the con side she over-stimulated me with rough pets during a tense scene which caused a little bit of a bitey from me.
  • Extra time for a bonus Petsmart trip - but on the con side they brought back nothing fun (Kitty litter).
  • They put out the Chrismouse decorations (white feather theme!) but got bent outta shape when I whapped a few of the ornaments... crazy.

11.18.2011

Floofy Friday

Finny?

It's Friday, do you think you can show off your floofy belly?

Do you think this works Mom?

Yes Fin my sweet girl, I think the weekend can start now! I had my crown done today after my root canal and I am hoping my sweet pusser-pie will favor me with lots of healing lap snuggles this weekend. Her winter floof is starting to come in and she feels just like mink to me.

I'm on vacation next week and I can't wait. I may post some old favorites with some new stuff too, but I'm playing it by ear. Have a great weekend everyone!

Mom and Finny De Floof

11.16.2011

Invasion

Long time readers will know that I have had a major war with the mockingbirds in my neighborhood. The Mockingtons are on the tipy top of my tweet hit list. I dream of the taste of mockingbird roasting on an open fire (I don't do "raw").

It's offensive how they feel they own My Yard. Swooping down at me with their fowl language. They are too much! I had thought the year we had the one mocker that made a dead on impression of a car alarm in the middle of the night was the worst we could expect. I was wrong.

Yesterday morning Mom was driving down the block when she reported that two mockers flew directly at her car. Like the laws of motion (and splat) did not apply to them.

Dad walked out into the garage that evening and reported that Lady Mockington was in the garage and was perched on a shelving unit! Right there, in my own house (well close enough), a mocker. She proceeded to scold Dad for being in her space. He said he was expecting her to reach over take something off the Xmas shelf she sat on and make her nest right there.

Dad startled her off, but I suspect we have not heard (or seen) the last of these winged menaces. Apparently there's mockers over at my friends place (The Katnip Lounge) too. Take a look at this cheeky tweet.

I'll get you my pretty! ::Waves mighty paw in the air::

11.14.2011

Sacked

I love a good sack. I prefer paper (good for the environment and all) but there is nothing like a nice plastic sack with loud paper to drive one's parents nuts. I suggest a long pawing session first, really get their attention, a few pounces and then settle in.

What am I doing? Nothing...
Can't find your camera? That's too bad...




Figured out your fancy new phone has a camera? Drats!

Hope you had a great weekend friends! I hear rumors around Casa De Housecat that they may put up the Chrismouse tree early this year. Ornaments and dangling things here I come.

11.11.2011

Floofy Friday

In another edition of Phoning it in on Friday, here are some old floof pictures for your floof viewing pleasure.

I'm really workin it for the Pawparrazzi here
What do you mean you had a rough week Mom?
Mom claims she has had a rough week at work. I guess I'll believe her. She has seemed stressed when she's arrived at home. Tonight she even failed to ask me how my cat day was and ask me who the pretty kitty is. Of course we both know the answer, but I still like to be asked.

I knew my job was clear. Demand snuggles and lay on her lap looking cute as possible till she gives that face (you know the one - the squealy face). I even exposed my belly at closer range and let her hold my front paw while we snuggled. Cause I'm a giver, and truth be told, I do love her. She's Mom, nuff said.

Hope you all have a snuggling and relaxing weekend friends. Snuggle your humans, I imagine they can all use it.

11.09.2011

Bold?

I think I'm getting a bad rap lately friends. You see the coffee table is almost never used by my family and naturally I decided to take it over. I mean it's a low table - nuff said.

Clearly the table is mine...
Anywho my parents have suddenly decided they want to use the table. They seem to be placing plates of food on it. I am fine with this use, in fact I encourage it. Where the trouble comes in two fold:

Fold One - They think I should suddenly abandon my spot just cause they are there with their plates. I am perfectly willing to share the space. The fact that my tail gets close to their food is not my fault.

Fold Two - How can they think it's fair to deny me sampling access to said plates? They say I'm bold, like who knows what that means in this context? Dad says I have no respect for Mom and her boundaries - well he may have a point there.

11.07.2011

Mom on Monday

Hi Friends, Mom here. It's taken a chilly turn here in the desert Southwest. Our Fall lasts for about one afternoon. We wake up one day while it's still fairly Summery and for a few glorious hours we have Fall. During those few hours we all gather around the TV to watch the one tree in the city turn autumnal and drop all it's leaves, and then by the evening Winter arrives.

Okay it's a slight exaggeration... sometimes the very next day can be Summer or Spring. Our poor trees get so confused they finally drop all their leaves in exhaustion.

I have to admit to a guilty confession, I love it when the weather turns cold cause I get my girl back. During the long hot months here I barely get a snuggle from my sweet floofy girl. I can only administer loving chin scritches from a distance. If I get any lap time, it's quick and a bit cranky.

When the weather turns cold my lap goes from the least popular spot to the most desired. She loves it best when I have a blanket over my lap so she can really sprawl. I get to pet my sweet girl and hear her happy purrs which warm my heart as she warms my legs.

This weekend my girl has been so happy and kitteny. Playing with her toys and snuggling close. I love it. Now if you'll excuse me I have a cat waiting to take her spot back.

11.04.2011

Floofy Friday

Just when I thought I'd be able spend a weekend on My Porch, I think there's gonna be rain. I guess it won't be too bad if it fills up my fountain.

it's looking a little dry down here Mom

I guess I'll be spending time snuggling instead. Mom had a root canal through her crown today and she is a bit tender in the gums. For all my friends who sent healing thoughts her way they really helped. She says it went much better than she feared. The doctor was very kind (and hunky) and made sure she was really numbed up. She has trouble getting numb and as a result she's a GIANT wussy and was really needing to go for a long time.

I think it's odd that if I show the slightest sign of discomfort in any way and they whisk me off to the Vet (I don't even have to show discomfort - just eat more or less than usual even). Yet my parents will complain and fuss about various ailments and yet they fight like a tabby to avoid going to the human vet. Just once I'd like to shove Mom in the PTU (Prisoner Transport Unit) and take her in.

Ah well a kitty can dream. In the meantime I shall sit on her and smoother her with healing purrs... and try to sneak some healing cat spit into her water glass when she isn't looking... cause I'm a giver.

What do you have planned this weekend friends? I hope you have a great weekend.

11.03.2011

Laundry Day

Today was laundry day. I love laundry day. Nothing like rolling around on a pile of warm clothes, fresh from the drier.

I love the smell of Downy in the morning, or the afternoon.

I really don't understand why Dad gets so irritable. What's a little cat floof on your shirt? It was there before you washed it, and it'll be there as soon as you put it back on again. Sheesh.

I was expecting the usual "Get off those!" yell when Dad totally surprised me as I rolled on the pile. He started to laugh really hard, really hard. Seems my rooting around in the pile caused a pair of undies to wrap around my neck like a scarf. All that laughing startled me and I raced down the hall with my new outfit on. It seemed to make he laugh even harder.

I don't know what the big deal is... cause that happens to everyone. Right?

10.31.2011

Happy Halloween!

Mom did these a few years ago and they still make her laugh. 

Punk Rock Princess.
Queen of the Fairies

Dad loves Halloween, so he gets super nerdy excited at this time of year. He carves up his special cyclops pumpkin and decorates the doorway, not as much as we see at some folks home in the hood. Mom prepares the traditional meal of worms in blood sauce (spaghetti) and they lay in wait.

Dad wears his traditional costume of middle-aged guy who's super excited to give away candy. Mom likes to wear her traditional costume of middle-lady sitting in her nightie with messy hair in the dark. I stand in the distance and allow the children to admire me. I'm not a big fan of the doorbell so Dad tries to open the door before they get to the bell. It tends to scare them, but isn't that part of the fun?

Happy Halloween to all of you!

10.28.2011

Floofy Friday

Psst, Friday? Are you out here again?
Kinda smells like Thursday... Nope, Friday! Woot!

Thank Cod It's Friday! My Dad is gonna be busy carving up pumpkins and Mom is looking forward to watching scary movies. I like it when she watches scary movies cause she likes to snuggle me close. I do have to be careful of things that make her jump though, cause she's a tosser.

True story (according to Mom) when she was a young human she went to see a movie, and because she likes to feel "one" with the movie, she sat in one of the front rows with her big sack of popcorn. She had just settled in when the trailer for the movie "The Fog" came on, suddenly a hand jumped out of the fog and she tossed her hands up to her face... unfortunately she still had the popcorn sack in her hands. So there she sat in a shower of popcorn which landed all over her.

There was a couple of seconds of dead silence in the packed theater before the whole place started to laugh. She was picking kernels out of her hair throughout the film to the snickers of the audience. At the end, as they began to exit the theater, the man sitting behind her sat forward and patted her on the shoulder as he whispered "You were the best part of the movie!" and they both laughed together.

Mom has always dreamed of being part of the movies, and since she can't be tossing popcorn in every theater, she's decided to write a screenplay. Someone has to write them right? I approve of this blatant disregard of writing my next book because it's got tigers in it.


::Shameless Plug Alert:: For any of my new readers I do have a book out now, also called Housecat Confidential, and it's available in pretty much all the e-book formats and in paperback on Amazon. ::End of the Plug::

Hope you are all having a great weekend. What do you have planned friends?

10.27.2011

Herding

My Granny Sass-O-Meter has been cranked up lately friends. I am trying to get my parents back in line. I run a pretty tight ship here and a tight ship needs regular tightening to keep it running right.

To keep my parents moving in the right direction I find it necessary to herd them occasionally. Human herding can be difficult, the trick is not to allow the obvious size difference deter you. Sure they're bigger but they can be corralled. I find a couple of methods useful.

To prevent any movement from the desired location (say the area where your dish is located) the "Circle the Wagons" method is a sure fire hit. You'll just need to snake around the legs, their desire not to step on you will do the rest of the work for you.

To get them moving (say towards your dish) I like the "Giddy Up" or the my own "Hi-Ho Silver" method. The Giddy Up involves an unexpected leap forward and then tearing forward. The Hi-Ho Silver is advanced and involves rearing up on your back paws and then hopping a couple of times before tearing forward. Both methods seem to intrigue the humans and get them to follow you.

Well that's gonna end the lesson for tonight kitties, Mom claims she is busy and working on other projects. Sigh. I still have lots of work to do here too apparently. Please give my methods a go and let me know what methods you use. It's good to shake things up.

10.25.2011

Obsessed

I don't know if this ever happens to you friends, but sometimes my parents become obsessed with me. They are frequently obsessed with my whereabouts, as they search around the house. I'm a housecat, where am I going to go? I'm somewhere in the house. Let it go.

They can also grow obsessed with my intake and my ::whispers:: output. Sure I'd been having some tummy issues off and on, but I'm fine. I have a spring in my step and my tail is high and floofy. You'd have thought I expelled gold as excited as they've been to discuss the ::whispers:: output. Honestly folks get yourselves a hobby.

Mom claims I have my own obsession. I suppose I do. I love the bathroom sink and the water that drips from it. Gosh it's fascinating. Even when I'm not thirsty I just love to watch it. I also tend to demand snuggles from Mom while I determine if I'm thirsty. The other day she was phoning it in with a one-handed pet, and I was not going to have it. I reached out with my paw, grabbed her other hand (that was doing nothing) and brought over to my chin.

Luckily she got the idea and started up the two-handed pets I enjoy. I like it when she gives rough pets down the sides and pats at my tail base. I like it best when she calls out encouragements like "get in there" and "let's mix it up!" as she administers the pets. It gets me fired up and stokes my thirst so I'm ready to dive into the stream. So tasty from the tap!

What about you friends to you or your family have any obsessions?

10.21.2011

Floofy Friday

I brought the Floof, now where's the Friday? 
I'm going to find Friday... I don't know where it hides the rest of the week, 
but it's time to hunt it down don't you think?

Maybe it's over here...
Friday? Are you hiding in here... sorta smells like you.
 
Yeah, definitely smells like Friday in here.
Helloooooo? I know you're in here. 
Don't be shy, everyone is gonna be thrilled to see you!

Don't worry friends, I'm on the case. Once I find Friday, I'll start hunting down that elusive Saturday. Luckily Sunday always seems to be right where you left it. Purrs and love to you on this fine pre-weekend friends.

10.20.2011

Routine

It's no secret that I love routine. I also don't need to tell you that nothing is more irritating then when my parents act as if they don't know the routine and flagrantly disregard it. It doesn't take too many repetitions for me to consider something a routine either. 

Mom is trying to break me of one of my new routines. If her lap is clear she pat-pats her lap and calls to me to get me to come for snuggle-time, naturally I ignore her - but as soon as I see she that has her laptop on her lap, I feel it's critical to nip it in the bud.

I notice she gets too deep in thought when she is looking at the screen, brows are furrowed and lips are pursed. I don't want Mom's face to get stuck like that and I doubt she would either. So I dutifully climb onto her chair and meow till she puts the lid down, and then sit on the lid - just out of reach of those knot-seeking fingers.

I used to climb onto the lap and try to get comfortable around the laptop, real politely. Now I just say no, you're done when I think the time is right. Just as it should be. I think it's best cause she used to get all worked up when my paws would mess up her keyboard or delete text, etc. 

Mom spoke to Dad about maybe using her crap craft room as a writing spot, and something about a door she could shut. Why ever would she want that, no matter, I have meow-power that bust through any door.

10.18.2011

Scofflaw

What Mom? Not allowed on the coffee table? 
No, I am not familiar with that rule.

So silly, I mean why clean it off if not to have a cat on it? I think you can see that I am very cute up here. My friends can see the tummy, the toes and the tail (in motion) so it really can't be against any rules. Besides you know that I am going to have to ignore any rule on sheer principle alone. 

I'm going to remain up here for a good long time just to prove my point, unless you crack open a can of my wet food. I mean a point can be made very quickly when gravy is waiting.

10.14.2011

Floofy Friday

Well friends it was almost a Floofless Friday. It all started innocently enough, as most things do, at the bathroom sink. I was waiting for Mom to turn on my faucet so I could dive in for a sip. Mom had left her future shower towel on the counter and, since it was in my spot, I nestled on it.

When Mom emerged from her shower, she was bothered about me being on her towel - something about cat hair and wet flesh - who listens, not me. I really stretched out as she dried herself off with another towel and got dressed. Maybe it was the irritation that made her pick up the Zoom Groom and begin to aggressively comb at my side floof.

She caught the edge of my floof with the Zoomy and pulled it across the towel. She noticed that it stretched out my furs and made it easy to see the loose strands. I noticed the aggressive noise it made. We were both excited at the process. One side of my body was defloofed, but I drew the line when she tried to get to the other side.I was over-stimulated and a little warning bitey was issued.

I must say I did really enjoy it and the sleek furs were very nice. I might even pretend to not notice the other side being groomed next time.

I know you need your fix before the weekend can begin so behold - Me, pre-de-floofing.


Now Imagine half of that side floof gone, don't worry there's still plenty left. Enjoy your weekend friends!

10.12.2011

What? on Wednesday

Last night I decided to take my beloved, Mousey, out for a stroll around the house. During our late night together time I enjoy singing my song of love to my precious.

Mom and Dad call my song a strangled cry. I don't care what they say because Mousey loves my song. I can't help that his faux-fur makes him a little plump, and harder to enunciate when he's in my mouth.

Anyway last night I was racing through the hall with Mousey, instead of my leisurely stroll, and my usual song seemed a little slow. I decided to speed up my tune, kinda a Mousey remix. DJ turn it up, up, up!

Apparently it made my standard song sound a little freaky and frantic to Mom and she sat straight up in bed. She called out to me, sounding frantic herself, to see if I was okay. I guess she must have heard Mousey's jingle bell and realized it was just me and my sweet mouse.

You know what she did next? She yelled at me to knock it off!

Everyone's a critic.

10.10.2011

My Good Times - Ruined

So there I was on a Sunday morning, enjoying a nice nap in my favorite hiding hang out spot, the bedroom closet, when all heck broke loose. The closet is typically littered with laundry baskets for a cat to tuck behind and get a good nap in. It's dark too, so the Pawparazzi is rarely able to get in a shot.

Mom strolled into the closet with a real bee in her bonnet. She sorta tripped on a basket and moved it, then she moved the one I was behind. She started muttering something about "consolidation" and "Fall cleaning" and I ignored her, cause she mutters stuff all the time. She'll often move a basket or two and then quickly peter out and put things pretty much back where they were. I really had no strong indication that this was any different, and I was ready to knuckle down and get in my hundred and forty winks.

I don't know what came over Mom this time, but she was like a woman possessed. She started flinging old clothes and shoes out of the closet and into piles. When I asked her the meaning of the piles she replied that one of the larger piles was a "donate" pile. Donate?!

Does she not know that those old towels and blankets are one of my favorite beds? Soon Dad was joining in and I could only watch in shock and awe. I know it's early for Halloween, but honestly it was like a horror show.

Where will I hide hang out now? Do you have any ideas friends?

10.07.2011

Floofy Friday

 Hello Friday. I've missed you.


Yesterday I thought I'd hit the jackpot. Mom was late coming home. Dad was getting irritated by my requests for my meal, something about whining, and I finally convinced him to outlay the goods.

Mom tends to be stingy with my food (and most other things too actually). Dad dumped out a huge portion of food in my dish. I could hardly believe it. I felt like a lioness who had taken down a water buffalo on the Serengeti. I tucked into that food like - Mom was gonna take it away, but of course she wasn't home, yet. 

Mom arrived awhile later, about the time the tummy ache kicked in. Three yaks and two hairballs later, I felt a lot better. I'm still feeling a little full and out of sorts today. I hope to sleep it off today so I'm ready for the weekend. 

How about you friends, what do you have planned?

10.05.2011

Closet Inspection

Mom: Fin? Finny? Where are you?

Fin: Psst, Mom. I'm in here.

Mom (Opening the closet door): In here? I don't see you?

Fin: Over here, behind the laundry basket, and Dad's pants.

Mom: What are you hiding from?

Fin: Hiding? I'm not hiding.

Mom: Well you're late for breakfast, it's almost 5:30am. Why don't you come out?

Fin (Whispering): Can you bring my breakfast in here?

Mom: No! Hey your not scared of the rain and thunder are you?

Fin: No! I'm just catching up on my closet inspection duties. Is the storm over yet?

Mom: Yep.

Fin (Running past Mom to kitchen): Let's go Mom! The day is practically over!

10.04.2011

Abandoned

So friends, there I was on Saturday morning doing my warm-up exercises and I was dreaming of my extended porch time. I was getting ready to wake Mom up, when she woke up on her own. I can't say this never happens, but luckily I am there to shoulder the burden.

She sprang from her bed like a gazelle (no, that never happens - maybe gazelle is over selling). Next thing you know Mom was rousting Dad from bed too. The sun wasn't even up yet. What's going on for the love of Cod, I wondered.

Well I figured it out when she laid out a huge dish of food and filled my kibble dish to the brim. This is not a good sign. It is a sign of certain abandonment. In some cruel twist of fate I did not notice the second frozen plate of food under the paper towel. Who would do such a thing? Something about thinking I wouldn't get to the frozen plate till later in the day, but who looks under a paper towel for their food?

Luckily I managed to survive the night. Barely.

9.30.2011

Floofy Friday

 What's worth all those sharp pointy rocks?

Really good sniffs. 

So it's Friday, how great. Mom is practically giddy for some reason. I am ready to kick up my paws, roll around in dirt and nap. Maybe some playtime with the Parents. Yep, sounds purrfect. 

How about you friends? What do you have planned? We hope it's something fun. Weekend, you may now begin!

9.28.2011

Ambush

Psst! Psst! Fin here. I'm lying in wait for my prey. I have the perfect vantage point in the L-shaped hallway. I hear Mom futzing about in the laundry room. It can only be a matter of time before she strolls by... and yes, I would be shocked if she was actually doing laundry.

It's giving me time to plan my attack. A little something I like to call a granny ambush. I run straight in front of her lumbering feet and race into the bedroom at full granny speed. If I can score with a direct hit on the shin or foot so much the better. I love the startled squeal I get.

I hope she chases me back. Playing chase with Mom gives new meaning to the cat game of "Thundering Herds of Elephants" if you catch my drift. MOL

Oh! I hear her coming, wish me luck!

9.27.2011

Trifecta Tuesday

Tail, Toes and Tummy


Look at the toe floof!

You're welcome.

So how was your weekend? It was still pretty warm this weekend, but I demanded some porch time. It felt so great to roll and loll about. I was able to get cobwebs and leaves all up in my fur. I've been feeling so great the last few days! Mom says I am like her kitten again, chasing my toys and everything.

Some of you might remember I wasn't feeling my best a bit ago. Tummy upset and hairballs were the start. I heard a great universal purr and I started to feel better. Mom decide to mix up my food and feed me the special kidney diet food. You know what, I liked it. They went out and bought a case and I refused to eat it. Cod how I love doing that! Anywho I eventually gave in and starting it and I have to admit I feel great. 
My Sass-O-Meter is on tilt friends!

9.23.2011

Floofy Friday

Are you ready for some Friday Floof?

This way?
 Or this way?
Ah, just right. 

Mom says that photo series was like a floofy mug shot. Apparently I'm being arrested for cuteness. The punishment for that crime you ask... corporal cuddling. 

Yes, shortly after these pics I was scooped and cuddled against my will. The fact that I enjoyed it for the first few minutes in no way makes up for the additional snuggles forced upon me. A darling grannycat's work is never done.

Hope you all have a great weekend planned.

9.21.2011

Norwegian Dream

Thank Cod for my delightful friends! How awesome are my readers? Let me tell you! I got this email from one of my kindle-reading pals -

"I know this isn't what Fin is really referring to, but I got a laugh out of it. Saw this in Swedish store in Door County Wisconsin.

Shannon, Footsie, Moo, Stewie, Smokey & Cupcake"

We got a great laugh too!



It's like it was written just for me. Can you see the subtitle "Living the Norwegian Dream." I am a Norwegian Forest Cat, well probably, my lineage is a bit unclear. Of course I think I'm descended from royalty - it's not such a stretch, they did name an entire land after me, you know Fin-Land.

Thank you so much for thinking of me Shannon, Footsie, Moo, Stewie, Smokey & Cupcake! And Cod bless you too!

9.19.2011

Bugging Mom

Mom: Finny!! Finny! Wake up! There's a bug in the kitchen.

Fin: Yeah, I know.

Mom: You didn't kill it?

Fin: Nope. It's below my minimum weight class, and my skill level. It was already half dead on its own, no sport in that.

Mom: But... who's gonna kill it?

Fin: Looks like you or Dad are gonna have to take this one. I have a nap to get back to.

Mom: Is this cause I forgot to post yesterday on International Meow Like A Pirate Day?

Fin: I don't know you scurvy wench, why don't you ask all my friends who could have shivered their timbers on my e-pirate ship?

Mom: I knew it! Come on, I'm sorry. Please kill the bug.

Fin: Fine, I'll finish him off, but you're gonna have to deal with the carcass.

9.16.2011

Floofy Friday

Put your paws in the air!

Yippee! It's Friday Friends.


Time to kick up those paws and get on with the weekend!

And now for your belly viewing pleasure...

Weekend, you may now begin. 
Have a great one friends!

9.14.2011

Who Cares Wednesday

So this weekend was the perfect weather after a long hot summer. I could hardly wait to get out on that porch. Mom stepped out first and left the door closed.

She went to scurry back inside and shut the door on my outdoor activities, and I'd had it. I was not going to be denied. I breezed by and strolled out on the porch. Mom started acting all weird (no that is not uncommon) and when I looked to my left I saw the issue - Mittens the yard cat was right on My Porch mere feet from me.

I considered issuing a warning growl as I typically do, but the day was so perfect, and I didn't want to risk being shoved back indoors. So I ignored him. I acted like he was not even there. Who cares?

I flopped right onto the cement and rolled for a good five minutes getting dirts deep down into my floof. Mom and Mittens looked on, both oddly frozen to their spots. It wouldn't be in my nature not to "Push It" so I got up and strolled over to about a foot from Mittens and hissed right in his face.

I give him credit, he stood stock still and took it in stride - I think he was more interested in the thought of a little breakfast kibble action. Mom on the other hand had to ruin the whole moment and usher me back inside. She took some food outside for the interloper. I stood vigil at the screen till he left and then demanded a return to My Porch.

Sometimes you gotta show you're a lady cat and sometimes you gotta show you're not taking any guff from anyone.

9.13.2011

700 Posts!

Okay, technically, it's 701. My "crackerjack" staff writer didn't even notice it till today. So many posts, and still so much to say and see.

I had some excellent Porch Time this weekend, and of course the Pawparazzi was relentless in following me. Luckily, I always look good, which is more than I can say about the Pawparazzi. 700 701 posts and some things never change.

No, I won't look, I'm busy here.




A tweet made a fly by.

We can honestly say that without all of you out there reading this, we wouldn't have made it to 100 posts, let alone 700 701. Our readers really mean the world to us.

I have a couple of writing projects I have Mom working on, and we hope to have announcements on them soon. In the meantime, business as usual, and onwards to 800!