I thought this might be a good time to lay down some rules on lap etiquette that I'd like obeyed.
- When I mewl at your feet, there's no need for you to ask "What do you want?" I want your lap of course. No I'm not going to jump right up there, I have things to take into consideration first.
- Entering the lap is not as easy as you seem to think Mom, there are shifty parts and lumpy parts and I often have to negotiate space with your laptop. If I claw some tender parts in the process, I'm sorry, no need to yelp about it, you big drama queen.
- When something startles me I will leap off, possibly taking small bits of your flesh with me, again I'm sorry.
- Don't squeeze the kitty, even though you enjoy the small noises I make when you do it. I'm not a squeak toy you know.
- I have to be in the mood for you to hold my front paws (never the back paws), don't assume I'm in that mood when you are.
- The scratches and pets are great, but once I decide those are over, and I'm moving on to the business portion, I no longer want the distraction. If you persist I'll have to nibble you.
- The business portion can include napping or bathing, and yes you do make a nice bath tub (all those soft angles that I can use to prop myself up on make bathing quite enjoyable).
- When you're "In the mood for a cat" don't assume I'm "In the mood" to be said cat. All your pleading will not make your lap more appealing. I'm a cat - if I came when I was called - I'd be a dog. So if I was on the fence about the snuggle, your begging has ruined it.
Finny Da Floof
You are right...the truth is timeless and never goes out of style! You made mewmie snort a few times...not sure why (um, did she think we had the same thoughts?)ReplyDelete
We are going to show this to our momma. She needs to know these rules!ReplyDelete
I am going to print this out and stick it on SS's cork board. I drew this list to her attention when it first appeared but she has very short memory.ReplyDelete
Those are great rules that all humans need to adhere to; thanks for the lap lessons for our Mom!...We so love da floof, Finny!!...xo...Calle, Halle, SukkiReplyDelete
We'r showing this to our mom straight away ~ fanks.ReplyDelete
We hope yoor mom is better soon. Smoochies.
Purrs for your mama!!ReplyDelete
We're glad your mom is feeling better and we're sending purrs her way.ReplyDelete
Love the post! We're going to post it in the Casbah Kitten office for all to see!
These are excellent lap rules, Fin. Because my Mom would be utterly hopeless at following even the most rudimentary ones, I don't like to do laps. Maybe she can memorize your rules and we can try again.ReplyDelete
Hope your Mom is better soon, since I am sure she is getting even further behind with your book :-(
That is so true Fin, so true. Purrs to your Mom!ReplyDelete
Fin, those are some pawsome lap rules!!ReplyDelete
We hope your mum is feeling much much better. Purrs!ReplyDelete
Fin, we think those lap rules apply to all our humans!!ReplyDelete
Glad your mom is feeling better...
We are sorry your mom was under the weather! Big purrs her way!!ReplyDelete
Oh, well done! Excellent rules! We'd like to print them out for our own human, if we may.ReplyDelete
Excellent post, Fin. We shall print that list up and fix it to the fridge door for the humans to read.ReplyDelete
We hope you mum is feeling better soon! xxx
Oh Finny Da Floof those are terrific rules. We have posted them right beside her chair so she won't forget them. You know, she is a little forgetful and her only excuse is that has a little age on her. Have great day. Hope Mom feels better soon.ReplyDelete
Thank you for those dos and don'ts - they will be very useful to pass on to our Mum and we're going to add one of our own:ReplyDelete
"Just cos we're sitting on your lap it doesn't mean we want brushing and combing"
We hope your Mom gets better soon!ReplyDelete
We don't mind the repost, because we had never seen it! It's definitely getting printed for the fridge so our Mom can read it every day!
Big purrs to your mom...we hope she is better soon.ReplyDelete
We loved the repost because mom's need to be reminded of the rules...it should be framed and posted in every cat home!
Oh yes, begging is always off-putting. We enjoyed reading this again. Your posts are so good you can pull this off easily!ReplyDelete
Many purrs to your mommy.
Siena & Chilli
So don't squeeze the Charmin or the cat? Got it.ReplyDelete
Lol. I have a rule nine too: I like belly rubs, until I don't want belly rubs. That's when you'll find my nails in your hand.ReplyDelete
Those are very good rules. We will print them out and pur them where mum can see them.ReplyDelete
We has printed these out and hanged them on the 'fridedator.ReplyDelete
Very well done Fin!
Now... how do we gets mommy to understand them, you would think you wroted them in cat-language or something.
Those are excellent rules, Fin!ReplyDelete
We are praying and purring for your mom! Get better soon!
Well done Fin, great rules all humans should abide by.ReplyDelete
Finny, I don't know whether to hide this post from Katie or force her to read it. Needless to say, she is one messed up kitty.ReplyDelete
Lap? Lap!!! No way. Katie wants no part of a lap on her terms or anyone else's.
And the whole dog thing... Well Gloman has apparently succeeded in brainwashing Katie. When he calls, she comes. She doesn't just saunter over, she often leaps and runs. When I call? Don't even ask.
We hope it's soon that your mom is better.ReplyDelete
And you were right to encourage her to share her information again. This is good stuff.
I am on my mom's lap reading this with her right now. I hope she is learning something.ReplyDelete